The First Church of Dana Scully, Scientist
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)
Q: Are you a Church?
A: We are really a School of Arcane Cosmicism, one that teaches the Tao of Scully. There are philosophies involved and certain forms of Yoga available, so you decide whether we are a “religion” or not.
Q: Are you an X-Files fan club?
A: No, not at all. While we admire Gillian Anderson’s continuing role as Dana Scully, we see in her character a Model of Human Behavior quite apart from the continuation or plot devices in the series.
Q: Why “Dana Scully, Scientist”?
A: Because Her profession is that of a scientist, and Her whole approach to solving the mysteries She is confronted with involves a combination of the scientific method and open minded skepticism. We love rationality, as long as it is willing to accept new data.
Q: Is this some kind of a “joke” church?
A: No. We embrace a lot of unusual philosophies and teachers, but we are quite serious about the truth they impart, including the ones normally thought of as humorous.
Q: Why do you capitalize the pronouns attached to Dana Scully?
A: Respect. She is a Avatar of Reason, and some say an aspect of the Divine, and who would we be to disagree?
Q: What is “Cosmicism’? Does that have something to do with Cosmology?
A: No, although Cosmology helps illustrate the reality of the philosophy. Cosmicism was the idea of writer H.P. Lovecraft, who believed that the Universe was so vast and unknowable that we were insignificant and ignorant of its greater mysteries. He thought that the more we learned, the more we were likely to go mad from the revelation or be on our knees, begging for the return of a new Dark Ages. Rather than this, we see Scully’s method of discovering the truth, no matter how unsettling, and gradually coming to accept it in a new scientific framework as Humanity’s best path to enlightenment.
Q: Oh, the Universe isn’t that strange! Surely you are exaggerating.
A: No, modern physics and astronomy indicate increasingly weirder aspects to the world we live in, and while many can cheerfully ignore them, they won’t go away. And stop calling us Shirley.
Q: I am a member of another religion. Can I join?
A: Can you? Up to you. We’re pretty open-minded.
Q: Do you want to take all my money?
A: Nah, you’re thinking of some other Sci-Fi Religion. We of course welcome donations—we’re on a limited budget here—but no need to bankrupt yourself for us.
Q: Do you preach the End of the World?
A: Sure, in about five billion years, unless the False Energy Vacuum State pulls a fast one on us. Otherwise, relax.
Q: What’s all this about redheads?
A: We firmly believe that redheads are a sign that the Universe loves us and has sent us, in the form of Dana Scully, Scientist, proof that there is something worth looking up to that isn’t out of the atmosphere. Freckles are just icing on the cake, as far as we’re concerned.
Q: Do you have a Book of Sacred Scripture?
A: Sure do. It’s The Book of Scullyation, available for $6.00 postpaid. See our webpages for more information.
Q: Where do I find out more?
A: Go to our Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/groups/1502639053378024/
Or send a dollar to P.O. Box 21152, Castro Valley, CA 94546.